It's Not My Fault!

When you have conflict in your life, do you try to determine the cause of the problem, even if that means YOU may be at fault? OR do you just shift the blame to avoid humbling yourself and admitting you’re wrong? Maybe you even think all of the controversy and strife in your life are somehow God’s fault?  Because controversy and contention leave no room for peace in our lives, it is crucial that we examine our hearts to identify and pull out the “root” cause of that contention. God’s Powerful Word gives us all the answers we need to live a godly, prosperous life.  Proverbs 13:10 says, “Only by pride comes contention.”  I have learned that pride is the MOST destructive root sin that a person can have and is the sin that God judges the most severely.  Pride causes us put ourselves above others and is the root cause of ALL contention and problems we struggle with in our lives.

There are quite a few examples in Scripture of how destructive the sin of pride is and how it is at the “root” of all contention we have in relationships but especially in our fellowship with God. 
Obviously pride was the first sin ever committed. We see in Isaiah 14:13-14, Satan’s prideful attitude caused himself and one-third of the angels to rebel against God. He and those angels were punished because of their pride and were removed from heaven and have been condemned for all eternity.
 
We also see the example of King Nebuchadnezzar in the Old Testament who had pride about all of his achievements in building Babylon in Daniel 4:30.  Because of the king’s pride and boasting, God gave him the heart of an animal. Nebuchadnezzar was driven out of his kingdom and forced to live in fields until he repented of his pride and recognized that it was God that was in control of everything. This approach was very effective because we see in Daniel 4:37 that the king gives praise and honor to God and NOT himself.
 
In God's Word we some of the destructive effects of pride in our lives: 
1) When we have pride, we will have shame.  Proverbs 11:2
2) Because of pride, we have contention.  Proverbs 13:10
3) Our pride causes us to fall and causes destruction.  Proverbs 16:18
4) God hates pride and it is an abomination to Him.  Proverbs 6:16    
5) Having a proud heart won't go unpunished.  Proverbs 16:5
6) Having a proud heart causes strife and problems.  Proverbs 28:25
7) Having a proud heart is sin.  Proverbs 21:4

We can see CLEARLY in Scripture that our pride is sin! NONE of these things God’s Word mentions about pride are blessings to us, so why do we continue in this sin?  We hold onto our pride because we believe Satan’s lies that this is “OUR” life and we are in control of it. We think we can do a better job at handling our situations than God can, and believe that WE are more important than God!

I know a lot about how destructive pride can be in a person’s life.  Just a few years ago, my life was FULL of contention, and it was ALL due to my prideful sinful heart.  I rarely asked God or anyone else to forgive me for anything!  I thought that all of the conflict in my life was someone else’s fault. I had absolutely NO peace!  Satan tried to ruin my health, my marriage, my family, and my relationships and wanted my destruction.  Satan’s goal for us is three-fold; it’s to steal, kill and destroy and he knows what to tempt us with.  Pride is a destructive condition of the heart and is not easily conquered. 

To conquer the sin of pride in our hearts we MUST confess our sin and declare to God that we are humbly bowing our selfish stubborn will to His authority.  MANY of us will even admit that we struggle with pride, but are not willing to humble ourselves under God’s authority. God DOES have MANY ways He could humble us if we insist on it, but God wants US to take the initiative and humble ourselves in His sight.

How do we humble ourselves before God?  

1)    Fall down at the foot of the cross of Christ. 

2)    Cry out to God to help us humble ourselves - when we see that we cannot handle things on our own, God wants to hear us cry out to Him for help.

3)    Confess our faults to one another- we usually want to hide our faults from others so that they will think highly of us. We are told in James 5:16 to confess our faults to others so we can pray for one another.   

4)    Confess our sins to God - Proverbs 28:13 talks about the person who tries to cover their sins and not confess them. 

5)    Serve others with the attitude of Jesus-  Jesus continually showed His servants heart by placing others above Himself by serving.

6)   Let ALL praise and glory be given to God, not to take the credit ourselves.

7)   Mourn over our sin and realize that we are beggars before God.

8)    Submit to authority - We can never expect to be blessed by our God if we are not willing to submit to God's authority or the leadership of those God has placed in authority over us in our lives (husbands, parents, pastors...)

James 4:6 talks about how God resists us when our hearts are full of pride, but He gives grace to us when we are humble.  Just as God resists us when we are prideful, we resist others in our lives that are prideful because we sense that they don’t really love us, but only love themselves. When we are prideful, people around us sense that we’re lacking genuine love for them so they will resist us. 
 

When we replace our pride with a spirit of humility, the controversy and contentions in our lives will greatly decrease.  Our marriages, families, and ALL of our relationships will improve when we begin to humble ourselves.  We need to learn to focus on the confessing the sin of pride in our own hearts instead of being consumed with all of the conflict and how we think others need to change. Our purpose is to honor and glorify God in all of our thoughts, attitudes and actions. Imagine what this world would be like if all Christians confessed their pride and were focused on glorifying God and not themselves. Imagine what kind of shining light Christians could be to the lost and dying world around us if we were more humble.   
 

Oh, the contention that we could avoid in our lives if we would only humble ourselves as God tells us to do!  God is waiting to extend His grace to those who will obey His Word.  “Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of GOd, that He may exalt you in due time."