QUIT BEING UGLY!

I believe there are many reasons why I've always been drawn to the southern lifestyle.  Maybe it's because I long to be one of those people who takes things at a slower pace and enjoys life's little blessings more. I adore it that in the south, front porches seem to be utilized more for relaxing, drinking sweet tea and sharing special moments with family and friends.  I could be partial to the southern way of life because I spent so much time while growing up with my Grandmother who was raised in the Florida.  With Grandma, sweet tea was a common staple at every meal, we showed our love by "giving some sugar" and several hugs each day were just a necessity of life.  She taught us by example the importance of investing in the lives of others by setting aside valuable time for fellowship with anyone who would come to her door.  We often spent many hours together just talking, laughing and building sweet memories that I will dearly cherish and treasure for the rest of my life.    

It wasn't until after I was married and we had our fourth child that our family got to experience living in the south firsthand.  I loved how people were so open with their feelings and weren't afraid to hug and love on everyone, all of the time.  They didn't worry about checking off all of their "to do" list in one day because visiting and enjoying each other was just more important.  Not only did we find that southerners were very kind, giving and hospitable, but who could resist their southern accents and knack for coming up with such colorful life analogies.

 A few of the sayings I especially enjoyed were, "things are flowing just as smooth as milk and honey", "Lord willing and the creek don't rise," and "well bless your little heart." There were times however, when I was a little confused by some of the phrases our southern friends used to say, because their choice of words definitely had quite a different meaning in the northern culture I grew up in. 

One such phrase that really threw me for a loop when I first heard it was when parents would sternly instruct their chi kids "Quit being ugly!" My initial thought was that it seemed kind of mean for a parent to tell their children that they were ugly.  After all, didn't God made each one of us special and beautiful in our own way?  And even IF a parent thought their child was borderline homely, how in the world could they expect their kids to "quit being ugly" all the sudden, right then and there.

 

After learning the true southern meaning behind this phrase, I soon realized that these were very insightful words and would forever become apart of our family's vocabulary, and for good reason.  You see in the south, "being ugly" does not at all refer to what a person looks like on the outside. What they are actually calling attention to is the unlovely condition of a person's inner heart when they are not doing right. This idea goes right along with what we are told in Proverbs 27:19, "As in water face reveals face, So a man's heart reveals the man."  I can't even tell you how many times I have used this analogy with my kids over the years.  It has definitely helped them see the importance of needing to get rid of an ugly heart and replace it with a clean and beautiful heart.  

 

Living in the south was an amazing experience and I'm thankful to not only have picked up on some of their vocabulary, but I have also adopted their down to earth, no "beating around the bush," slightly sassy attitude in parenting.  Southern people are extremely sweet and loving but also let it be known that they expect certain respectful behavior when it comes to their children.  I noticed that they do not make or accept any excuses for wrong behavior and disobedience, and they want it fixed as soon as possible.  Southern parents seem to nip disobedience right in the bud and make sure their child knows when they need to "quit being ugly" and promptly change their heart. 

We should all keep in mind the fact that it's our own personal choice every day whether or not our actions and attitudes are ugly or beautiful.  God tells us in Proverbs 4:23,

Everything we think, say and do flows from the condition of our heart.  If our heart is ugly because we are allowing sin to fester down deep inside, the evidence of that sin will eventually spill over into our thoughts, attitudes and actions.  We may think we're skilled at covering and concealing our sin, but if it's not taken care of and confessed, the ugliness will most definitely rear it's head sooner or later.  Our heavenly Father does not allow us as His children to make excuses for harboring and in pride trying to cover our sin instead of confessing and forsaking it.  1 John 1:8, "If we say that we have no sin, we are deceiving ourselves and the truth is not in us."

Maybe the next time we're in sin and are deliberately refusing to let it go, we need to focus on the fact that if our heart is ugly, we are not guarding it like we should be.  I believe this southern phrase "Quit being ugly!"is totally biblical and that the world would be a lot better place to live if we all took heed to the wisdom behind these three simple but life changing words.