Does It Take 'Will Power' or God's Power?

Most people following my blog have read my very first post called “Saved from the Road to Destruction”.  It’s my story of how God radically changed my wicked heart after many years of inner rebellion.  More than 4 years ago I finally humbled myself and gave up the intense struggle to control my own life and let my Creator have the preeminence for the plans He has created me for.  Although I’ve been enjoying awesome freedom, peace and joy in my life like never before, I’ve continued to struggle with one area that I honestly believed was simply a matter of ‘willpower’.  To win this battle, I thought it was up to me to exercise self control with a few prayers sprinkled in along the way for good measure.  I have believed the Enemy’s lies which have kept me locked up in an emotional prison where I’ve been tortured by this looming problem that would never go away.  Oh how I’m thankful for God’s patience concerning my sin, but earlier this summer I came to a breaking point that has further altered the course of my life.  I don’t enjoy sobbing in front of people, so I’m thankful that none of you reading this post can witness the tears that stream down my face as I pour my heart out to you today.  My passion is for others to learn from the lessons God is teaching me so you can avoid needless suffering.

I’ve heard that the power of sin lies in the secrecy of it, so it’s now my desire to be transparent about the strongholds that have kept me from totally being who God wants me to be.  I’ve been enslaved to the limitations of being overweight for about 12 years.  All along I was hoping that maybe I had some medical problem such as a hormonal issue or possibly my thyroid was out of balance.  If I just had some sort of medical condition that prohibited me from losing weight I could explain my tremendous struggle.  After being checked out by a few physicians I discovered that all my efforts had been in vain!  Test after test came back that proved I was not suffering from any condition that would keep me from losing weight.  I then moved on to the theory that I just needed to muster up enough will power to stick to a healthy eating plan to lose those stubborn pounds.  My goal for losing weight was not even so that I could wear 60% more of the clothes in my closet.  My motivation is much more important than having more variety in my wardrobe.

Lately I been witnessing the truth that James talks about in James 4:14, “…For what is your life?  It is even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away.”  I’m now more desperate to live this life God’s given me to the fullest and accomplish whatever He has called me to do with NO regret.  I realize that I need to be healthier and be able to serve the Lord better and longer.  Please know that I am in no way even implying that anyone who is overweight like me is in sin because God makes us all different colors, shapes and sizes and we can all be used for His honor and glory regardless of any of those factors.  The key to success and blessing in this life is for each of us is to simply pray and ask God to reveal His will and for us to humble ourselves and be sensitive to the promptings of the Holy Spirit in areas He wants us to change. None of us are perfect, but we must constantly be reaching for the goal of becoming more like Christ and be willing to allow God to transform us in every single area.

Let’s just say that I will always refer to the summer of 2013 as another instance when God lovingly ‘kicked me in the seat of my spiritual pants’.  I willingly admit that these strongholds regarding my weight were not easily loosened at first.  I’ve been blinded for 12 years by Satan’s lies to try to get me to hold onto the sin so I would never be free.  Our Enemy also works in any way he can to derail us from accomplishing ALL God has for us to do and therefore miss out on blessings He has for us.  The Holy Spirit began to get my attention through a book we’ve been going through in our adult Bible Study class which is called, “Follow Me “by David Platt.  As I listened to the video of the author who is also a Pastor, I became greatly convicted that it was about time I yielded my ‘will power’ to God’s ‘Almighty power’ that could truly change me to the core.  I learned that our God has created a craving in each of us and has designed those cravings we have to ONLY be fulfilled by Him.

As I listened to the author speak further, I thought about all of the cravings I’ve had over the years which were mostly concerning sugar, chocolate, and just comforting foods in general.  I finally realized that I had lots of cravings, but I was trying to fulfill those longings with food instead of God.  I’ve also learned through this study that we can “live for the fleeting pleasures of this world, OR we can live for the everlasting pleasures in God.  ONLY God is able to bring infinite joy and satisfaction in our life and anything other than God is simply a CHEAP imitation that ONLY brings guilt!”  If there were ever a “poster child” for suffering from a guilty soul, it would be me.  I could totally relate to these truths I was learning because for years I had tried to meet my emotional needs with food.  I’m a homeschooling mom of 5 and on those extra challenging stressful days, I felt I ‘deserved’ to satisfy my cravings for comfort food to help me cope; so shouldn’t I be able to treat myself all of the time?  Isn’t this the exact philosophy of the world as it teaches us through all of those chocolate and fast food commercials?  Let me clearly state the fact that chocolate or yummy food is NOT evil.  Those things are ONLY wrong when we substitute them in an effort to satisfy our cravings and comfort us when our needs are ONLY able to be truly satisfied by our Creator.  I’ve also learned that if we are delighting in anything other than our God and relying on the things of this world to satisfy our longings, then we are being blinded and will never experience true freedom and the joy that Christ intends for us. 

The day when the Holy Spirit began to convict me about this sin, I was visibly in turmoil all day as God continued to work on me.   I could not sleep well at all that night and kept praying for God to show me what I needed to do to get rid of the struggle inside me.  In the morning I woke up and got on my knees and read the verses in Psalm 51 where King David humbled himself and was broken before God over his sin of adultery.  As I sobbed I read these verses back to God:
(Psalms 51:1-4, 10-12)  “Have mercy on me, O God, According to Your loving kindness; According to the multitude of Your tender mercies, Blot out my transgressions.  Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, And cleanse me from my sin.  I acknowledge my transgressions,  And my sin is ever before me.  Against You, You only have I sinned and done this evil in Your sight- that You may be found just when you speak, And blameless when You judge.”  (Vs. 10-12)  “Create in me a clean heart O God, And renew a right spirit within me.  Do not cast me away from Your presence and do not take your Holy Spirit from me.  Restore to me the JOY of Your salvation, And uphold me with Your generous Spirit.”
I finally begged forgiveness from God for replacing the cravings HE has given me with cheap worldly imitations and asked for transformation in my heart and life.  I immediately felt the heavy weight of sin lifted off me and knew that the power of God had taken all of those longings away.  I John 1:9 says, “If we confess our sin, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sin and to cleanse us from ALL unrighteousness.”  No matter who we are or what we’ve done, and no matter how long we may have done it, when we confess our sin to God the slate is wiped completely clean by Him.  I am overjoyed to also note that since the heaviness of my “spiritual weight” was lifted off of me that day through confession of craving the wrong things, I have also lost almost 30 pounds of “physical weight”.  This is the beginning and I’m trusting in God’s power to enable me to lose the rest of the weight slowly over time.     

If you’re depending on your own “will power” to change any area of your life, I promise that you will not see permanent results.  As with all things, band aids do not heal, you must get to the “root” of the problem to find true and lasting victory.  Galatians 5:24 tells us, “And those who are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.”   We no longer have to be slaves to our sin as it states in Romans 6:6, “Knowing this, that our old man was crucified with Him, that the body of sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves to sin.”  Just as we would never expect a heart surgeon to operate on someone’s brain to fix a heart condition, we cannot expect to overcome a spiritual problem we’re struggling with by using the ‘will power’ of our mind.  God never designed our intellect to cleanse our heart from sin.  We must humbly yield our will to God’s, see our sin how God sees it and confess it for our heart condition to be healed.  Our solution lies in allowing God to transform our desires into His desires, and to crave Him instead of cheap imitations.

Do you have an area of your life where you know you have been craving, longing after or worshipping something other than God?  If you’re like me, you may have struggles you’ve dealt with for years and you’re still trying to muster up enough ‘will power’ to conquer them?  You may need to finally give up on your ‘will power’ and be yielded and willing to allow God’s ‘Almighty power’ to take control of your heart instead of those other things you’ve been craving.  It’s through humility of heart, brokenness of spirit and admission and confession of our wrong cravings that will allow us to draw on our God’s awesome power to overcome strongholds in our lives.  May you then experience to true joy that David talks about in Psalm 51:12, “Restore to me the joy of Your salvation, And uphold me with Your generous Spirit.”   Only God can do that kind of transformation, no will power needed!     

Frosting Can't Fix Every Problem

I admit that there have been a few times in my baking history that I’ve totally bombed with something I’ve created for my family.  We’ll never forget the time when I misread the recipe for one of our favorite desserts.  Everyone’s taste buds were salivating for homemade hot fudge pudding cake which I’d been successfully baking for years.  I believe that my slightly elevated hormones at the time may have played a factor in my confusion, leading me to alter a few portion sizes in the recipe.  When I finished mixing everything together in the bowl and poured it into the baking pan, I rationalized the batter’s soupy appearance in hopes that it might turn out better than ever before.  Though I knew down deep inside I must’ve mixed up the ingredients, I remained optimistic.  I reasoned in my mind that since I was working with chocolate and sugar, there was no way anything could possibly go wrong! I placed the batter in the oven and left the kitchen to attend to some household projects while it baked. 

A while later, I heard a strange noise coming from the kitchen and wondered what could be happening!  I slowly opened the oven door to find that the whole cake had blown up like a volcano everywhere.  Oh the sight of burnt chocolate pudding splattered all over my previously spotless oven!  Besides being quite humbled at the explosion of our dessert, I still had hopes of salvaging some of the outer edges for us to enjoy although they were a little crunchy.  The cake was not very pretty, but since I really strive these days not to pass judgment on the outer appearance of things, I ignored the negative and focused on finding the positive.   As I served the remaining portion of burnt cake to my kids, I assured them that it could’ve turned out far worse.  No matter how much frosting or powdered sugar I smeared on the top of the cake to cover up the problem, it was still ruined.   None of my efforts were going to solve the problem and I couldn’t pretend like it didn’t exist.  Although I’m not a professional baker, I do know that our dessert disaster stemmed from my neglect to follow the recipe accurately.   Frosting wasn’t the solution; I had to vow to follow the recipe more closely in my next baking adventure to ensure success.

Does this same type of scenario ever occur in other areas of our lives?  Do we sometimes find ourselves in a mess and attempt to solve our problem by pretending it’s not there or by covering it up?  The danger of ignoring conflicts is that if we don’t handle it biblically our Enemy will most definitely use it to cause destruction in our lives and the lives of others around us.  Our motivation in every situation that comes into our lives should be to give honor, glory and praise to our God and unresolved conflict never pleases Him.  I Corinthians 10:31 shows us clearly what our goal should always be, “Therefore, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do ALL to the glory of God.”  Although dealing with conflict is never pleasant, I’m thankful to have encountered many situations that God has used to help me realize the power of the truths He teaches in His Word.  When I have a dilemma that extends beyond my baking catastrophes, I can never expect to truly resolve it unless I am committed to following God’s recipe for resolution which is clearly stated throughout Scripture.  

There may be times when we feel we don’t even possess the proper skills or understanding to work through conflicts.  Most of us haven’t had years of training in counseling and all of the ‘philosophies’ of how to deal with different kinds of conflict.  Most of us don’t fully understand the methods and strategies of sociology and all of the disorders or syndromes our modern day psychology has claimed to uncover.  BUT we can intimately and personally know the very One who created our hearts and minds in the first place.  We have the privileged opportunity to possess a deep relationship with the ONLY One who totally understands the intricacies of the human brain and our entire body, soul and spirit.  If God created us and knows everything about us then I’m certain He knows how to solve ALL of our problems.  Our Father is omniscient and has a solution for every single problem in our lives if we would only follow His recipe.  We’re told in 2 Peter 1:3, “As His divine power has given to us all things that pertain to life and godliness through the knowledge of Him who called us by glory and virtue.” The solution for every problem we have is found in His Awesome Living and Powerful Word.   

Whether we encounter conflict with another person or it’s an issue we’re struggling with inside our own heart, there are biblical steps we can take to bring resolution:

1)     Admit there is a problem.  Ignoring it or refusing to discuss it does NOT make it disappear. Be open to the possibility that the problem may even lie with you.

2)     Pray for God’s wisdom and guidance in getting to the root of the problem, whether it’s our own turmoil or issues with another person.  “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God who gives to all liberally….” (James 1:5).

3)     Don’t be a hypocrite!  We need to humbly and thoroughly cleanse our own heart from harbored sin before we’re qualified to resolve conflict with another person. “Hypocrite! First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck out of your brother’s eye.” Matthew 7:5

4)    Once our heart is pure of unconfessed sin, we must go and humbly speak the truth in love in a spirit of gentleness to the person who has offended us or whom we have offended.   Ephesians 4:15 says, “But speaking the truth in love…” Galatians 6:1 tells us, “Brothers, if a man is overtaken in any trespass, you who are spiritual restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness…”

5)    If they do not desire to biblically bring about resolution, we can bring witnesses with us to try to plead with them to resolve the issue.  Matthew 18:16, “But if he will not hear you, take with you one or two more, that by the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established.” 

6)     If we’ve been offended, it’s our responsibility to forgive our offender no matter what.  This ensures that God will forgive our sin so we can live in freedom from the prison of destructive bitterness. Jesus says in Matthew 6:14-15 “For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.”

7)    When we’ve done all we can do but the conflict remains unresolved, release the relationship to God and pray for Him to work in the other persons heart.  Pray for God to bless them with a humble sensitive spirit. “Bless those who curse you, and pray for those who spitefully use you.”  Luke 6:28 

We can also get so wrapped up in the other person’s wrong responses toward us and how they’ve hurt us which is exactly what Satan’s goal is for us!  If our enemy can distract us from the utmost goal of bringing God glory and honor in every situation, he has won the battle.  We must remember that even if our offender does not respond correctly, it is our goal to make sure we’ve done everything possible on our part to make the situation right.  Romans 12:18, “If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men.”  I have also come to realize that even if I attempt to have a good relationship with everyone I know; it is a fact that not everyone will like me or care to have fellowship with me.  There will be conflicts that may not ever get resolved.  It all boils down to the fact that each of us will only be responsible to God for our own sin, not for someone else’s sin.
      
There were many years that I just ignored problems with others by trying to smooth things over which never brought lasting solutions.  I also believed that if I just eliminated difficult people from my life it would solve all of my problems.  I thought it would allow me to live a life of perfect bliss because I’d never have conflict again.  The only problem was that I still had my own selfish sin nature to deal with.  I was so prideful and wouldn’t take responsibility for what I did wrong and lived a life of inner turmoil and bitterness toward others.  I’m thankful that God has humbled me and worked in my life over the past several years to allow me to clearly see the truth.  I’ve also realized that God purposely allows us to encounter conflict so that we will learn, grow and mature from it, making it an opportunity to honor and glorify Him.  Just like putting extra frosting on a cake won’t cover up a baking disaster, ignoring or glossing over problems in our lives won’t give us true lasting solutions.  

Is there some hidden sin hindering your personal relationship with God right now?  Are you having conflict with someone at this time in which you’ve previously enjoyed sweet fellowship with?  We must realize that if the problem still exists, we haven’t truly dug down deep enough to uncover the nasty root cause.  We can be sure that our Enemy will grip firmly to that root so that we will never get the problem solved. Satan then has full advantage to wreak havoc in our lives and the lives of others around us, bringing damage to God’s kingdom.  Just like putting frosting on my hot fudge cake couldn’t cover up the fact that I didn’t follow the recipe, ignoring God’s clear recipe for conflict resolution will never heal a damaged relationship.  It’s only when we mix in the ingredients of humility, confession, forgiveness and love that we can reach the point of biblical reconciliation and restoration.  It is when we are finally committed to faithfully following God’s way of conflict resolution that we’ll be free to live in harmony and peace with God, ourselves and others. 

Denying Our Denial

Most of us would describe ourselves as very loyal and devoted people.  We will always be faithful and true to the end, unwavering, steadfast and firm in our allegiances to those we love and value greatly in our lives.   Although we tend to cling to this positive perception of ourselves, what do our actions truly reveal about our character and our real motives?  Are we as dedicated and trustworthy as we believe ourselves to be or could we be more honorable, responsible and reliable in our close relationships?  What about our loyalty to the most important relationship we will ever have with our Savior?  Evaluating our inner heart’s intentions with the truths of God’s Word is the best place to initiate our internal inspection to see if we have some changes to make.  It would be beneficial for each of us to closely examine ourselves to determine whether or not we are in denial about our sin of denial.  I must admit that God has been working on transforming me big time in this area over the past few years.  I’ve been learning to identify and allow God to change the areas in my life where I’ve been denying Him on a regular basis.  As you read this post, I pray that you will also see where you may be denying Christ and how He may want to transform you as well.

As I reflect on some examples of real life people in the Bible who seemed to be devoted to God but then openly denied and disobeyed Him, the primary people that come to mind were Jesus’ very own disciples.  They were His closest friends who claimed to love Him and whom Jesus loved greatly. They spent three years of their lives following Him and witnessing His love and compassion for those He came to save.  We all know the account of Judas Iscariot and how He betrayed the Savior for thirty pieces of silver and later was so overcome by the guilt of his sin that he committed suicide.  We see how grieved Jesus was by just knowing that Judas’ would betray Him in John 13:21, “When Jesus had said these things, He was troubled in spirit, and testified and said, Most assuredly, I say to you, one of you will betray Me.” How much pain it must also cause Jesus when those who claim to love and follow Him continually choose to betray Him over and over again.

Peter was another one of Jesus’ disciples. He identified himself as a devoted follower of Christ who loved Him greatly which makes his denial seem to be more surprising than any other.  In Matthew 26:31-35 Jesus is explaining to His disciples how all of them would be made to stumble and deny him that very evening.  For a short time later they would all fall asleep during the time when Jesus had asked them to fervently pray for Him.  Out of all the disciples, Peter vehemently and publicly proclaimed his loyalty to Christ by declaring in verse 33, “Even if all are made to stumble because of You, I will never be made to stumble.”  Jesus then tells Peter in verse 34, “Assuredly, I say to you that this night, before the rooster crows, you will deny Me three times.”  In his response that Christ would even imply doubt concerning his love and faithfulness to his Savior, Peter adamantly announces his unfailing love and allegiance in verse 35 saying, “Even if I have to die with You, I will not deny You!”…   We then see that Christ’s prediction is beginning to be fulfilled when Peter was confronted by a little girl in verse 69 who says, “You also were with Jesus of Galilee.”  Peter said in verse 70, “I do not know what you are saying.”  In verse 71 another girl saw him and said to those who were there, “This fellow also was with Jesus of Nazareth.”  In verse 72 Peter denied the accusation saying, “I do not know the Man!”  After awhile there were people who came to Peter who said to him in verse 73, “Surely you also are one of them, because your speech betrays you.”  Finally in verse 74 we see that Peter even curses and swears and shouts, “I do not know the Man!”  How could Peter deny the One who he had claimed to love so dearly that he would even die with Him rather than betray Him?  How could someone like Peter be completely committed to serving and following His Savior yet so easily become unfaithful and disloyal?

How do these biblical accounts of betrayal by Judas, Peter and the other disciples relate to us in this day and age?  We would never sell out Christ today and betray Him for money like Judas did, or would we?  We personally would never fathom the thought of denying Jesus like Peter did, or do we?  After all, we are always faithful and pure in all of our motives and we would never dream of placing any allegiance above our devotion to our Savior. All of the disciples had seen Christ work amazing miracles right before their eyes and witnessed every day the deep love and commitment that Christ had for mankind.  We have all personally seen the power of God accomplish mighty things in our own difficult seemingly impossible situations.  Just as Judas, Peter and the other disciples seemed to forget so easily about God’s faithfulness and goodness to them, we too often fail to remember ALL that He’s done for us and choose to disregard the indescribable unfailing love and devotion Christ has for us.  We ‘claim’ to love Christ and be sold out for Him, but we continue choosing to deny Him regularly . Maybe we’ve never had a gun pointed at our head by someone threatening to kill us if we don’t blatantly declare that we’re denouncing our faith in Christ.  Maybe we’ve never uttered the words “I do not know the man” like Peter did three times in a row or traded our allegiance to Christ for money like Judas did.   We may have never even publicly denied Christ in front of unbelievers; however we all definitely demonstrate our denial and rejection of Christ in numerous other ways every single day. 

We often show our ‘denial’ of Christ by how we spend our time, our money and our talents.   In reality, none of these belong to us in the first place.  This life we are living is really God’s life.  The time we waste is actually God’s time.  The money we spend is really God’s money.  The talents and abilities we believe we possess have been given to us on loan by God to accomplish His eternal purposes.  Our life, our time, our money, and our talents are all God’s and have been given to us for the sole purpose of bringing honor and glory to Him and Him alone, not ourselves.  In any area of our lives that we are not totally devoted and sold out for Christ and His purposes, then we are certainly denying Him.  There are countless areas in which we choose to betray Christ on a daily basis.  Here are just a few in case you are still not convinced that you yourself ever deny Him:

1)      We do not regularly read and study God’s Word.  If we do read it, there are times when we do it out of duty and not because of our utter devotion and hungering and thirsting after Biblical truths.

2)      We do not pray like we ought to, seeking after God’s will and direction for our lives.  Sometimes our prayers are empty, meaningless and sweet communion with our Father is broken because we choose to grip tightly to our sin instead of confessing it.

3)      We waste our time choosing to be entertained by media for hours a day instead of advancing the cause of Christ that will count for eternity.

4)      We fail to speak up when the Holy Spirit prompts us to talk about our faith in Christ with others.

5)      We often refuse to give God ALL of the honor and glory for a situation and allow ourselves to receive the praise for what God has really done.

6)      We take the credit for the talents and abilities that God has given for us to serve Him and others with.

7)      We choose to waste our finances on frivolous meaningless expenditures that bring us temporary pleasure rather than investing in the kingdom of heaven.

8)      We allow our minds to be consumed with worry, fear and anxiety because we do not trust in our Sovereign Creator.

9)      We attempt to accomplish things on our own rather than depending on the strength of our Father.

10)  We chase after earthly pursuits that will never bring us true satisfaction instead of resting in the Only One who can ever meet our needs.

When we see all of the ways that God’s own children blatantly choose to deny and replace Him with their own selfish desires, I cannot even imagine the extreme pain and agony it causes our heavenly Father.  I do not dare claim to fathom the devastation that our Savior feels when His creation chooses to continually deny Him.  On a human level however, I can definitely identify with the deep pain of being betrayed by those I dearly love and have sacrificed for.   I have personally experienced the anguish that accompanies blatant rejection by a loved one.  I have felt that gut wrenching pain and agony that reaches to the deepest innermost part of my soul as a result of being traded in for and exchanged for worldly passing ‘pleasures’ that only bring destruction to the lives of those who blindly chase after them.  I understand the feeling that results from being tossed aside by someone I thought loved and appreciated me and someone I adored and would even give my life for.  Maybe you too can empathize with the despair that comes from someone denying you?  Maybe you’ve endured utter ruin in some of your relationships because someone you believed valued you unexpectedly denied you and your love. 

 Although we may have endured the devastating pain of a loved one’s betrayal, none of us have ever come close to suffering and giving up what Jesus has sacrificed for all of us.  How much more excruciating and intense the pain of betrayal that Christ must endure on a regular basis by His very own children?  We are only partakers of Christ’s suffering as we travel life’s road.  God knows the pain we bear and promises in Hebrews 13:5, “I will never leave you or forsake you.”   He will always be close beside us to comfort us through our suffering, and He knows and understands our pain of rejection very well.  When we have experienced firsthand the heartache of betrayal in our own lives, it should cause us to deeply empathize with our Savior’s pain when we forsake Him.  The pain we have felt personally should stop us dead in our tracks from the desire to ever deny Christ again.

So should we just all give up because we’re doomed to the fact that we will continually be led away by our selfishness and pride and deny our Lord?  Absolutely not!  The cure for betrayal and denying Christ is for us to obey what Christ calls the “greatest” commandment of all.   Jesus reveals this greatest commandment for us to follow in Matthew 22: 37 “Love the Lord your God with ALL your heart, with ALL your soul and with ALL your mind.”  Anything short of totally loving God with ALL of our being as Christ commands is to deny Him as Peter, Judas and the other disciples did.  As we see in Peter’s life, God thankfully does not toss us aside and render us useless for His service because we have betrayed Him.  In Scripture we witnessed Peter humble himself before God after he sinned against Him.  Peter saw clearly his wicked sin of betrayal after denying Christ three times, and wept bitterly in remorse over his sin.  God forgave Peter and used him greatly just a short time later when Peter preached to the multitudes and 3,000 souls were saved.   We must also humble ourselves and admit that we’ve traded in our loyalties to Christ for our own selfish sinful motives.  Keeping our heart pure through continual confession of sin will allow our commitment to Christ to reign foremost in our life.  Our loving and forgiving God will also use us to accomplish His purposes even after we have denied Him, when we come to Him and confess our sin of betrayal.  How amazing and awesome our God is to forgive us of so much and use us greatly in spite of our past sin! 

As you reflect on your own thoughts, motives, speech and actions, are you in denial of the fact that you deny Christ at times?  I’m amazed at myself and how I’m so easily swayed into a bad attitude, selfish motives, unkind speech and disobedient actions on a daily basis.   At times I’m unthankful, unyielding and unwilling to always ‘see’ the true amazing power of God at work all around me, every single day.  I’m so much like the Peter in that I ‘claim’ to love and adore my God yet I allow myself to be pulled away from my complete allegiance to Him and desire to exalt my own will and way above God’s ultimate plan for me.  If I have so much work to do in these areas of betraying Christ, maybe you can identify with me as you’re reading this post.  If so, I pray that you will begin to humbly come before God and confess the areas in which you may have betrayed Him.  It’s time for us all to lay down our pride and stop denying our denial of the One who loves us more than anything and gave His life to prove it.

Throw Away the Plastic!

It’s time for radical action.  We need to throw out ALL of the plastic!  No, I’m not implying that we immediately purge our kitchen cupboards of our entire Tupperware collection or refuse to recycle our plastic and just throw it in the garbage instead.   I’m not even referring to cutting our plastic credit cards into little pieces and pitching them so that we won’t ever be tempted to overspend.  The kind of plastic I’m talking about has to do with the fake masks that each of us put on from time to time.

 Every one of us has chosen to wear our shiny little plastic veneers in the presence of others in an effort to look better than we really are.  We work so hard at trying to cover up our imperfections and vulnerabilities so that no one else can ever see the real us.  We’re not comfortable with letting anyone know if we’re hurting inside, stressed out or struggling with a personal or family problem.  The whole practice of hiding our weaknesses or pain from others is disheartening because what we desperately need during difficult times is encouragement, love and support from others who can identify with our pain.  However, we continue to believe the lie that the precious mask we insist on wearing will bring us the respect and admiration of other people in hopes that they will think more highly of us.  The falsehood behind this thinking is that in reality the mask we hold so dear really isn’t beneficial to us at all.  Our plastic most certainly never benefits or encourages anyone else whatsoever.  The only purpose for wearing our perfection mask is to present a false impression that our lives are ideal, we have no problems and that we are better than everyone else.  When other people believe the lie we’ve got it all together then it makes them believe they can never measure up to our false façade.  They also feel that there must be something terribly wrong with them because they aren’t perfect like we are and they’re the only ones struggling.

Where is the most common place that I have observed women sporting these not so attractive plastic masks?  It’s in our churches that I’ve seen many of these masks most commonly being modeled.   What better place to pretend like every area of your life is perfect and problem free than in front of other believer’s right?  We let on like we’re faultless and never mention any battles that we’re facing on the inside for fear of being judged by those who appear sinless.   What in the world does carrying out this sort of make believe scenario actually accomplish? What a terrible thing to feel as if you cannot share your burdens with others because they may look down on you for being less ‘spiritual’ than they are.  If I have learned one thing for certain in my lifetime so far, I’ve never met any human being who is without sin.  In fact, there isn’t anyone who has ever walked the face of the earth who was perfect except Jesus Christ.  The last time I read Romans 3:10 it still said “There is NONE righteous, no not one.”   That means that none of us are perfect and to pretend that we are stems from a heart that is in desperate need of a good spiritual cleaning.

The biggest problem with wearing these masks is that we are ignoring what God instructs us to do in His Word regarding serving others, which is sin.  There isn’t a person alive who doesn’t long deeply in their soul to be encouraged by other people, especially when we are battling sin issues in our life.   We all need to be lifted up and built up by those who are in the body of Christ who are to genuinely love and care for us.  Instead of making people believe that we lead an ideal sinless problem free life by hiding behind those plastic masks, we could actually decide to start being transparent from now on.  We could actually begin talking about how we struggle so we can help others with what God has taught us because every human being struggles with something.  

We see time and time again in Scripture that it is our responsibility to love, encourage, support and build each other up.  If we neglect these commands from God then we are choosing to be disobedient to Him.  Our Creator designed us in such a way that we crave the love, support, comfort, and encouragement from other believers.   I Thessalonians 5:11 shows us that we are to “Therefore comfort each other and edify one another…”   I believe so many of us in our churches are failing miserably in this specific area.  God teaches us in Galatians 6:2 that we are to “Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.”  James 5:16 says for us to “Therefore confess your sins to one another and pray for one another…”   We cannot obey these commands to love, encourage, pray for and serve others when we refuse to remove our “holier than thou” plastic mask.

So why is that we insist on holding tight to those fake masks that God never intended for us to wear in the first place?  It is most definitely our pride that motivates us to put on those plastic masks every week.  It is our pride that fuels our need to cover up our sin.  God never planned for His people to go around acting like they were perfect but to encourage others in the things that God has been teaching us.   One of my favorite passages of Scripture that I absolutely love is Psalm 51 where King David pours out his soul to God in his prayer of confession for his sin of adultery with Bathsheba.  I can identify with King David in so many ways.  God lovingly placed David’s account of repentance and forgiveness in Scripture as an example for each of us to follow.  What if David had learned all of those lessons about God and His great mercy, love and forgiveness but decided not to share any of it with anyone else?  The sin that we deal with and what God teaches us along the way is extremely valuable and can be used by God to work in other people’s lives to encourage them in their walk.  In Psalm 51:13 David talks about sharing what God has taught him with others.  “Then I will teach transgressors your ways and sinners will be converted to you.”   We’ve all heard the saying “Christians certainly aren’t perfect, they are just forgiven.”  This is extremely important to remember when we’re tempted to put on those plastic masks.

 Do we truly desire to continue wasting this earthly life with empty shallow relationships devoid of any deep spiritual meaning at all?  Are we completely satisfied with surface acquaintances we see once or twice a week as we greet them with our plastic smiles?  When everyone is busy pretending to be sinless, we will never enjoy the true biblical fellowship that God intended us to experience with others.  We waste time focusing our conversations on more surface issues, discussing things that don’t really matter for eternity.  I don’t know about you, but I long for deep lasting friendships with ladies that I can be myself with and talk about what I’m struggling with.  I now have developed several of those amazing friendships and I praise God every day for those ladies.  Life has more meaning and purpose when you have established godly relationships with others based on love, support, encouragement, transparency, and godly admonition.  It’s definitely time for all of us to reach deeper beyond the surface and live richer more abundant lives making a greater difference and impact for the cause of Christ.  This will never become reality if we continue refusing to throw away our plastic.

I know personally all about hiding behind a plastic mask because I wore my little mask everywhere I went for years.  I polished it extra clean and shiny before I ever entered through the doors of our church building each week.  I really believed that my mask was so convincing that it could even fool God.  I thought if I pretended enough and went through the motions of the Christian life on the outside that it would be enough to get me by but we can NEVER ever deceive God.  We may be able to con everyone around us but God won’t ever be snowballed by our outward actions. Our Creator is the only One who truly sees the exact condition of our inner heart.  There were times in my rebellious state that I even neglected to bring my Bible with me to services because I didn’t want to have to carry it, but boy I never forgot to wear my mask!  It brings me to tears to think of how spiritually apathetic I was that I even fell asleep during church services often because I thought it was boring, but at least I had my mask on.  Over the years, my kids were constant observers of my superficial motives and how I simply went through the motions of the Christian life.  I can’t even begin to explain to you the devastating effect our prideful hypocrisy as parents has on our children.  We’re only condemning our children to a life of plastic masks when they see us modeling insincerity and dishonesty to others.  I’m thankful that my radical heart change which caused me to throw away my plastic has paved the way for my kids to refuse to be plastic recyclers.   

I’m not saying that getting rid of the masks will be easy or that we should even expect everyone to participate.  Sadly, some will never humble themselves and remove their masks.   If we go before God in the spirit of humility, He will transform our hearts in ways that we never dreamed would be possible.  I choose not wear my plastic mask anymore, I finally placed my sin of pride under the blood of Jesus and asked for forgiveness for exalting myself and my will above God’s will for me.   This requires an ongoing process of confessing my sin of pride and asking my heavenly Father to teach me to be more like Christ.  I can’t even explain how wonderful and freeing it is to be transparent and open with others about the sin I’ve dealt with and continue to deal with.  I am done worrying about what other people think of me, I now choose to concentrate on what my Savior thinks and knows of my true heart motives.   Yes, I’ve gotten some wide eyed looks the first time I meet someone and begin telling them about how God has worked in my life regarding my sin.  Most Christians don’t even feel comfortable talking about sin anymore because they might have to relate to someone on a deeper level than they’re used to.  And they certainly would never want to expose their own sin struggles to anyone else because of their pride.  The fact that Christians often ignore the subject of sin even in our churches must make our Enemy pretty happy because we’re playing right into his plan.

What would happen this Sunday if none of us wore our masks?  I believe that being real about our sin would actually lead to revival in some of the churches where people play the “perfection” game every week.  Maybe you could be the first to take off your mask in your ladies group and start an amazing work of the Holy Spirit in your church.  Are you willing to follow Christ’s commands to be pure in heart and see God do awesome things in your life?   In this world where so much of the ‘real’ has been replaced with fake plastic, let us all rise up and come together in an effort to rid ourselves of the plastic masks and be the women God has called us to be.   No more plastic!

Don't Ever Say "I Love You..."

Do not tell someone you love them if you are impatient with them and do not demonstrate gentleness and thoughtfulness towards them, for true biblical love is longsuffering and kind.

Don’t claim you love someone if your actions reveal jealousy or boastfulness because real love does not envy and is not conceited in any way.

Don’t even utter the words “I love you” to another person if your heart is full of pride and you’re rude and offensive to them.  Genuine love demonstrates the humility of Christ and is not insulting to others whatsoever.

Don’t declare your love for another person if you are selfish and insist on having your own way.  Authentic love is never self-centered, self-seeking or egotistically focused.

Do not say you love someone other than yourself if you are irritable or resentful.  The perfect example of love modeled by God in His Word is in no way angry, bitter or easily offended.

Don’t proclaim love for another human being if you are unforgiving and rejoice at the wrongs others have done.  Biblical love does not delight in the failures of others and keeps no record of past sin.

In other words, we cannot truly say “I love you” to our spouse, our children, our family, or our friends if any of the above characteristics are the least bit evident in our attitudes, conversation or actions.  When impatience, rudeness, jealousy, pride, irritability, unforgiveness, and bitterness are detected in our lives, it simply mirrors the condition of our inner heart for all those around us to see, even if we are blinded to it.  This is a dangerous state of heart and mind and must be taken care of right away before it causes more destruction. 

When my husband and I were married 24 years ago this month, we received many very nice wedding gifts.  Picnic baskets seemed to be an extremely popular gift back then because I believe we received six or seven of them.  Out of all of the beautiful presents our loved ones bestowed upon us as we began our new life together, a gift that has remained one of our favorites is a beautiful cross stitch of I Corinthians 13.  As a newly married couple, my husband and I took pleasure in hanging it directly above our couch to serve as a great reminder to us of what “genuine” love looks like.   I distinctly recall reading through this passage of Scripture many times as it hung on our wall during the years I was feeding our babies late at night.  Those verses were especially convicting to me as I tried to ignore them during the times when my husband I were engaged in strong disagreement for the first several years of marriage.  I remember thinking to myself, ‘How in the world would anyone ever be able to live up to those Scripture verses about love!’  I thought it would be impossible to possess that kind of amazing love for someone, unless of course you were married to the ‘perfect’ person.  Thankfully I finally figured out that the ‘perfect’ spouse doesn’t exist.

As you can clearly see, I had the wrong perspective!  I was selfish and wanted my own way many times.  I was prideful and easily offended.  I was jealous and impatient with the fact that my husband didn’t totally understand everything about me and meet my every need.  I was an unforgiving and bitter person.  To be totally transparent with you, I used to keep a special notebook of ALL of the hurtful things my husband said or did to me so I wouldn’t forget them. What’s even MORE embarrassing is that I kept one for my sister too because I thought she was way too forgiving!  Can anyone else identify with me on this?  I was completely blinded to my own sin and pride so that I could spend all of my time concentrating fully on my husband’s sin.  Okay, by now you are realizing how messed up I really was!  I had absolutely NO concept of TRUE biblical love whatsoever. 

If I had continued to remain prideful and refused to humble myself before God, I believe that my marriage would not have survived for many more years!  My self-seeking bitter heart would have eventually destroyed every relationship in my life if left alone to fester and further poison my heart.   Praise God for the Holy Spirit’s conviction of my sin through the preaching of His Word and the healing restoration that our confession of sin brings to our soul.  I John 1:9 promises, “If we confess our sins, He is FAITHFUL to FORGIVE us our sins and to CLEANSE us from ALL unrighteousness.”   God’s forgiveness made possible only through Jesus’ blood purifies us from absolutely EVERYTHING we’ve done wrong, but it can only begin with bowing in humility on our part.

I now possess a deeper understanding of how you can love someone else with this biblical kind of love.  If God can transform my ugly heart by allowing me to better grasp the love of Christ and how to demonstrate His love to other people, then He can change anyone!  Humility is the key to possessing this authentic biblical love described for us in the “love” chapter.  We can continue to claim to love our spouse, our children, our friends and our family members but if our definition of love doesn’t match up with God’s definition, then we don’t truly love anyone other than ourselves.

I Corinthians 13: 4-13 

⁴ Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant ⁵ or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful;^{[a] 6} it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

⁸ Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. ⁹ For we know in part and we prophesy in part, ¹⁰ but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass away. ¹¹ When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways. ¹² For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known.

¹³ So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

The next time you think about expressing your love to someone else by saying “I love you”, I challenge you to first compare your attitudes, actions and the words you choose to speak with God’s version of love demonstrated clearly in First Corinthians 13.  We can claim to be loving people who truly care about others, but the proof of our love will be evident to everyone around us. God also tells us at the beginning of I Corinthians 13 that we can have ALL knowledge and possess ALL faith, we can give ALL of our possessions to feed the poor and even become a martyr for Christ, BUT if we do not possess authentic love for others, we are absolutely NOTHING! 

How sad that many of us are personally missing the mark when it comes to showing biblical love! We are wasting precious time that passes way too quickly by remaining self absorbed, self centered, and self seeking. How will we ever influence anyone for Christ if the only love we demonstrate to others is the love we have for ourselves?  How about you, would others say the love you proclaim for them matches up with God’s definition of biblical love?  If not, now is the time for change! 

Savor the Handprints

 

There was a time in my life when as soon as I noticed any handprints on the windows or glass doors in our home that I quickly grabbed the Windex bottle and promptly cleaned them off.  After all, there’s not a mother alive that enjoys seeing kids smear their handprints all over clear shiny glass, right?  But as I’ve gotten older I’ve noticed that my standards have loosened regarding all of the smudges I see left behind.  I knew something strange was happening to me several months ago when my sister and three of her kids stayed at our home.  Their youngest little daughter was about 18 months old at the time and she really seemed to enjoy playing peek a boo next to our glass French doors.  After they left to go home, I was cleaning up around the house and distinctly remember walking past the doors where my sweet little niece had been playing.  It brought me joy to discover that her handprints were all over the glass.  My heart was warmed so much that a little part of her still remained for me to enjoy that I couldn’t bring myself to clean the smudges off.  What in the world was happening to me?
 
I truly believe at that very moment that God was revealing to me one of His tiniest blessings to savor. It was sad for me to realize that I’d missed out on “seeing” those handprints as special occurrences over the years as our kids were growing up.  When it comes to our spiritual lives, many times we’re totally blinded to the amazing handprints that God lovingly leaves behind for us to enjoy. Often we may only notice the more substantial blessings He bestows on us and tend to overlook the tiny details He has orchestrated together for our good and for His glory.  No matter what stage in life we may be going through, it’s never too late for us to finally open our eyes to God’s divine handprints all around us.

As my husband and I are nearing our 24^th wedding anniversary this next month, I recently revisited in my mind all of the amazing details of how God brought us together almost a quarter of a century ago.  I look back and marvel at how all of the pieces of our love story fit perfectly together, just as if it had all been planned by a sovereign Creator.  Here are some of the interesting details of how God began to knit our lives together years before we even met.

1)  In the spring of 1987 at the Youth Conference at Faith Baptist Bible College, Richard recalls seeing me because I attended the youth banquet with one of his friends.  I was sixteen years old.

2)  In the spring of 1988, as a senior in high school attending the Youth Conference once again, I noticed Richard for the first time and almost fainted because he was extremely handsome and wore a suit!  I found out he was actually a Youth Pastor who had brought his teen group to attend the conference as well.

3)  In the fall of 1988, my freshman year at Faith, I briefly dated a nice young man who I found out was one of the teens in Richard’s youth group the year before.  At Faith’s college break, this guy went back home and told his Youth Pastor Richard all about me and thought he had found his wife already.

4)  I became very close to my resident advisor in the dorms who was giving me special insight on Richard because she had actually dated him right before me.

5)  I’d been writing letters to a guy in high school who I later found out was a friend of Richard’s as they grew up in the same area in Nebraska.  This young man was able to give Richard special insight on what kind of person I was.

6)  On November 1^st, 1988, Richard’s friend that had been writing me finally introduced Richard and me in the college cafeteria.  That same guy drove me two hours to go on my first date with Richard and was our chaperone for the weekend.  Of course we included him in some of our special wedding photos 8 months later.

7)  When I gave Richard my family’s address back home where I grew up, he thought it sounded very familiar.  It turned out that he had actually been sending letters to the girl that lived in my house long before I moved there, about 8 years earlier.  My bedroom was in the very room where she wrote her letters to MY future husband.  How many times does that happen?

8)  As a Youth Pastor, Richard had attended a conference in Indiana a few years before we met.  He thought my last name sounded familiar at the time when we were introduced.  He figured out that he had stayed at the very same home as my uncle during that conference.  Richard enjoyed visiting with my uncle and getting to know the family he’d eventually be marrying into.

Just in case you haven’t realized it yet, God cares about every microscopic detail about His children.  So much so that in Matthew 10:30 we are told, “And even the very hairs on our head are numbered.”  Our Creator knew each of us before we were even born and fashioned our bodies into existence.  Psalm 139:13 says, “You knit me together in my mother’s womb.”  I absolutely love Psalm 34:8 which says, “Oh taste and see that the Lord is good…” because our Amazing God is extremely good to us and gives us “exceedingly abundantly above ALL that we ask or think.”(Ephesians 3:20)  God deeply loves us and longs to bless us more than we can ever imagine.  He also greatly rewards those who delight in His goodness.  Psalm 37:4, “Delight yourselves also in the Lord: and He will give you the desires of your heart.”   We need to greatly praise and thank our sovereign God for all of the many ways He touches our lives with His divine handprints.

 If you desire to be truly blessed, I challenge you to take some time to recall all of the little details that God has pieced together in your life. God not only desires for us to see Him working in the more visible things, He also wants us to look close enough to notice the smaller handprints He leaves behind for our good.  We are to share these visible “handprints” with others and encourage them to look for God’s touches in their story as well.   I will never look at handprints the same as I once did and I’m learning to be more careful to savor them.  Now that I have been blessed to be called ‘Grandma’, I do believe I will cherish those tiny precious handprints in a way I never have before.  

 If you come to visit my home sometime, do not be surprised if you see some smudges and smears on my lower windows.  It only means that I’m taking the time to finally focus more fully on ALL of the little blessings my heavenly Father has given me.  How about you?  Do you stop and take the time to savor the handprints God has left behind on your life?  Too many times we are quick to rush over and wipe the smudges clean without giving thought to taking delight in the very One who put them there.  God is unfathomably good!